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Thread: Straightedge within families

  1. #1
    Registered User Paracetamol's Avatar
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    Straightedge within families

    I was thinking about this a while back...I don't know of anyone who is straightedge (or indeed drug free) who has a brother/sister or parents who are too, and this struck me as interesting, mainly because there are many other values within families that are shared. Siblings also tend to have similar life experiences and peer groups (although of course this is very variable with age). It would also seem that sharing of ideas like this would be something natural within families as brothers and sisters can learn alot from each other.

    Obviously, I realise that these are quite general statements as every family is different, but I still think it's interesting.

    If you agree that more than one straightedge person in a family is a rare thing, why do you think this is? Because straightedge is quite an extreme stance which is not analogous to other 'shared family values'? Because of intrinsic differences in music tastes? Something else?

  2. #2
    http://www.rodri-go.com/ rodrigo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paracetamol
    I was thinking about this a while back...I don't know of anyone who is straightedge (or indeed drug free) who has a brother/sister or parents who are too, and this struck me as interesting, mainly because there are many other values within families that are shared. Siblings also tend to have similar life experiences and peer groups (although of course this is very variable with age). It would also seem that sharing of ideas like this would be something natural within families as brothers and sisters can learn alot from each other.

    Obviously, I realise that these are quite general statements as every family is different, but I still think it's interesting.

    If you agree that more than one straightedge person in a family is a rare thing, why do you think this is? Because straightedge is quite an extreme stance which is not analogous to other 'shared family values'? Because of intrinsic differences in music tastes? Something else?
    because some people think different, and just because its a family doesnt mean that everybody has the same opinions about stuff. so that would involve the opinon about drugs, music and everything.
    to me, family values always went pointed to other things, like being a family, friends, standing by them...
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  3. #3
    Registered User Paracetamol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rodrigo
    because some people think different, and just because its a family doesnt mean that everybody has the same opinions about stuff. so that would involve the opinon about drugs, music and everything.
    to me, family values always went pointed to other things, like being a family, friends, standing by them...
    Yeah, I know that because it's a family everyone doesn't have the same opinions about things, I'm just saying that there are a lot of things which members of the same family feel the same about, because of being brought up a certain way, and I find it interesting that being drug free doesn't seem to be one of these. For instance, my parents don't go out and drink. I think my dad has been in a pub once in his life for a drink. They do drink at home though. But I guess there was an always implicit message they were sending out that alcohol wasn't really great. This wasn't really a major factor in me wanting to become drug free, but it would be silly to say it had no effect. However, my brother, who is only 3 years younger than me, thinks that there is nothing better than going out and getting drunk, and talks about alcohol quite alot. It is a big part of his life. My views are alien to him, and I was never like that at his age.

    I don't know. Maybe this is a silly topic. I just think it's testament to just how unique we all are.

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    http://www.rodri-go.com/ rodrigo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paracetamol
    Yeah, I know that because it's a family everyone doesn't have the same opinions about things, I'm just saying that there are a lot of things which members of the same family feel the same about, because of being brought up a certain way, and I find it interesting that being drug free doesn't seem to be one of these. For instance, my parents don't go out and drink. I think my dad has been in a pub once in his life for a drink. They do drink at home though. But I guess there was an always implicit message they were sending out that alcohol wasn't really great. This wasn't really a major factor in me wanting to become drug free, but it would be silly to say it had no effect. However, my brother, who is only 3 years younger than me, thinks that there is nothing better than going out and getting drunk, and talks about alcohol quite alot. It is a big part of his life. My views are alien to him, and I was never like that at his age.
    were you the first child?

    Quote Originally Posted by Paracetamol
    I just think it's testament to just how unique we all are.
    did you ever doubt that?
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  5. #5
    Registered User Paracetamol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rodrigo
    were you the first child?
    Yes I was

    Quote Originally Posted by rodrigo
    did you ever doubt that?
    No, I didn't. But I also don't doubt how impressionable some people are and the significance families and all the stuff that goes on within them has on some people's lives

  6. #6
    Im A Person Just Like You but I like to fuck some shoes D1988's Avatar
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    I was the first to be born in my household and I only have the one brother. Since I can remember up until he was 14 he used to look up to me a lot and used to try and copy me with things and do stuff I done. but since then (he is now 16) thats has changed, he keeps everything private to himself and doesn't really associate himself with me anymore, he went on and started liking different things and enjoyed doing different things. This doesn't bother me, I am glad he moved on and is now doing what he wants to do. I remember when I was younger complaining to my mum and dad that he wouldn't leave me alone and would always try and copy me, there exact words were "He is your little brother, thats what little brothers do". haha it was actually so true at that point. But nowadays it is totally different.

    I guess the same thing applied, when I was younger I used to go lots of places with my dad and do tonnes of stuff my dad liked doing (like going out training the dogs and hunting and stuff) but then I grew out of that and started playing guitar, playstation and hanging around with my friends. My little brother went through this with my dad and then with me but now has moved on to doing what he wants to do.

    I can understand what this topic is about, I really can. But I think the reason for people younger or maybe even older siblings moving on is mostly related to age but also maybe the people they hang around with, at and outwith school and such. When you are an 11 year old kid I mean you do what your friends are doing, you all try and do the same thing, but when you are older like 16-17 you start doing what you want to do a lot more. I think that ties in with a lot of 13-14 year olds drinking, some kids get into drinking and smoking at early ages and most of the time there friends will start doing the same, thats something to do with why we have so many under agers drinking in the country at the weekends. When the kids get to an old enough age they do stuff for themselves and don't just follow along with what others are doing.

    I hope some of this made sense.

  7. #7
    Duchess of Adventures xvunderx's Avatar
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    I'm the only drug free person in my family, my parents have a drink most nights, they don't get drunk often at all, but do drink, my sister drinks socially too.

    I think my folks kinda think about drinking less after they dome to stay with me and Dusty though. I think my actions put a drug free lifestyle in my families consciousness, but don't know how much effect it has over all.

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    attilla's greatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreat grandhun SgtD's Avatar
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    i'm the only drug free person in my family too. No extreme examples of drinking in my family, but everybody has drinks every now and then. i tried to approach my brother with punk and hardcore music since he was 10 or so, but he only seems to be interested in it now that he is 13. now, he likes ignite, and i think maybe that's a great opening for the edge.
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    Registered User hardcoretta's Avatar
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    My dad is an alcoholic and my mother drinks in the weekends, but my older brother used to be drug free while i was getting in the straight edge thing, and we lasted 3 years being drug free in his case and straight edge in mine, but he quit it, i don't know why.
    Cuandon tengas ideales x los cuales luchar, te darás cuenta que no debes callar.

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    Registered User Sand Stealer's Avatar
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    My mum and dad will both have the occasional drink. My brother and sister are getting to the age now where they could start drinking etc. (He's 15 and she's 13) but although they're not straight edge, they do seem to have been influenced a little by me. They say that they really respect me for not caving into peer pressure etc. and they both don't seem all that interested in drinking or anything like that. I'm a good influence! :D
    ~*~ Sarah~*~

  11. #11
    Killing Machine 24x24's Avatar
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    My Father was an alcoholic and my Mom drinks rarely. My middle brother drinks and I think he smokes and dips among other things. My littlest brother is against all drugs but he is only 15. I think the mindset sometimes comes from rebellion. Being that my father is a drug abuser, I subconsiosly rebelled by staying away from drugs. Than I found out about sxe. By than I didn't care abou rebelling but the lifestyle was already in my brain. Does that make sense? Just a theory.
    glory through victory,
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  12. #12
    Registered User sXe Commish's Avatar
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    My dad is an alchoholic and my mom is almost at his level - I'm an only child and most of my aunts, uncles and cousins are either drunks, crackheads or have already died from the overuse of such toxins.

    Lets just say I have no family and yes, I'm the only sXe kid in my group of friends.

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    My family aren't exactly my favorite people, about the only thing I have in common with any of them is that my dad likes organic and health foods too. I don't get along very well with any of them, but not because they're alcoholics or anything. My parents are very controlling, and pretty insensitive. My little sister is pretty selfish and spoiled, but she's the only member of my family I get along with. I feel slightly protective towards her, but I'm trying to get her to be able to deal with her own problems (after what happened last weekend, I'm not sure I want to help her anymore either). My brother exists purely to spite me- I can't spend two minutes at home without him shouting at me that I'm a "fag" or "gay" or something similar. He loves manipulating people (whether through fear, threats, or lies). He gives off a very huge impression of "future wife-beater" within the first 30 minutes of meeting him (or so every single one of my friends who's met him says).
    The good part of this is, I won't feel guilty about not remaining in contact with them after I leave home.
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