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sleepyboi
04-15-2012, 10:54 AM
A lot of people contribute sXe with underage teens who are just trying to be cool with the fact that they can't do anything. I've had so many people tell me that what I'm going through is a phase and I'll "get over it" once I hit my 20's. I know people who say "I was exactly like you were until I was 25, then it all went downhill". They associate someone who doesn't do substances as being "immature" or "too young to handle them".

I admit that maturity wise, I never really matured past the age of 10. But I'm still a respectful, decent human being, and the amount of hatred I have to withstand is terrible (not just on this subject, on pretty much everything; my appearence, personal tastes, the paths I've chosen in my life, etc.).

People tell me that the only reason I don't drink is because I can't get a hold of it. Really? I knew 12-year-olds who drank and got high regularly. A lot of people in my school started the drinking/hard partying routine at like 15 or 16. Obviously it's not hard to get a hold of. Anybody can. It's sold in gas stations. Pot is sold in school hallways.

How about I don't WANT to get a fucking hold of it? That's not a possiblity? The only explanation is that I'm an immature crybaby who needs to grow up? And not that my mom almost died from an oxycodone and alcohol dependency?

I'm not gonna change. There's people who don't. I have a friend who I think is 30 and she still doesn't drink alcohol. People may mock her for it, she's thick-skinned though and can withstand it. I honestly don't know how she puts up with people bitching to her. She's stronger than I am.

Anybody else get this? I know some of you guys are probably older than me (I'm 19).

straightXed
04-15-2012, 06:39 PM
A lot of people contribute sXe with underage teens who are just trying to be cool with the fact that they can't do anything. I've had so many people tell me that what I'm going through is a phase and I'll "get over it" once I hit my 20's. I know people who say "I was exactly like you were until I was 25, then it all went downhill". They associate someone who doesn't do substances as being "immature" or "too young to handle them".

I admit that maturity wise, I never really matured past the age of 10. But I'm still a respectful, decent human being, and the amount of hatred I have to withstand is terrible (not just on this subject, on pretty much everything; my appearence, personal tastes, the paths I've chosen in my life, etc.).

People tell me that the only reason I don't drink is because I can't get a hold of it. Really? I knew 12-year-olds who drank and got high regularly. A lot of people in my school started the drinking/hard partying routine at like 15 or 16. Obviously it's not hard to get a hold of. Anybody can. It's sold in gas stations. Pot is sold in school hallways.

How about I don't WANT to get a fucking hold of it? That's not a possiblity? The only explanation is that I'm an immature crybaby who needs to grow up? And not that my mom almost died from an oxycodone and alcohol dependency?

I'm not gonna change. There's people who don't. I have a friend who I think is 30 and she still doesn't drink alcohol. People may mock her for it, she's thick-skinned though and can withstand it. I honestly don't know how she puts up with people bitching to her. She's stronger than I am.

Anybody else get this? I know some of you guys are probably older than me (I'm 19).

The fact is a large amount of people who choose to be straight edge in their teens do end up drinking a few years later. Thats something you are just going to have to accept and understand, because that is the more common occurance is people following suit and finally drinking alcohol. This is sometimes for the reason that you mentioned that it is more readily available but more so that it is an ingrained part of society. Its an easier choice to just go with the flow and partake in some drinking.

None of this means you will drink but when people end up drinking as the norm and a lot less people continue to refrain from alcohol then you can see why people have formulated such ideas about how you will turn out. I'm not excusing it i am just saying its something you will have to learn to accept. I mean i am 34 and i am still straightedge but some people i know are still expecting me to drink a beer at somepoint, they are just unable to fathom that it holds absolutely no interest for me at all.

But alcohol at 15 or 16 may not seem hard to get hold of but in comparison to how much a part of everyday life it becomes in adult life alcohol as a teen seems scarce. I mean your teachers don't invite you out for drinks, your boss may well do so. A place to meet and socialise for kids is probably not a bar. Even eating out as an adult is an oppertunity to have alcohol sold to you. A lot of your friends may succumb to the social norm of drinking whilst watching a film or football game or playing video games and it just ends up everywhere as you get older. All your friends end up getting married and having functions and parties where alcohol flows. My advice is learn to deal with peoples opinions on it now as you are going to continue to hear this crap for a long while if you are sticking with it.

But for me its water off a ducks back, none of it really bothers me anymore, but if you let it anger you and piss you off then i think you will struggle. You might find that allowing your actions to do the speaking and not worry too much if they think you will drink will put a stop to the idea that you are somekind of crybaby. I mean someone thinking you will drink in the next few years isn't really a big deal is it?

You may want to look at the not maturing past 10 years old thing though, that doesn't sound too great.

sleepyboi
04-15-2012, 09:11 PM
I honestly don't see why I need to act "like an adult" according to everyone else's definition. I don't see why I need to have sex or do substances or like "adult" things. I mean there's parts of me that have grown up, but some parts of me would rather play with Legos and watch cartoons. I see no harm in that.

I've been getting shitty opinions about myself my whole life, and I just never really got over it... I feel it's really unfair and God should not be doing this type of thing to anyone. Maybe if people knew what I've been through, they'd stop mocking me, but I kinda doubt it, since people are generally assholes anyway. I admit I can't handle any criticism, which is why I'm so antisocial.

Kid Edge
04-16-2012, 01:07 PM
I get what you're trying to say,but still,you do need to gain some thicker skin.I know it's something I need to work on,and I've made some progress.But if you keep worrying about other peoples opinions about you,you ain't gonna go nowhere in life.I'm sorry,that's just the truth.

You aren't like everyone else.That's why people have shitty opinions of you;they're scared of how different you are.If you get all offended over it:mission accomplished.If you say "I don't give a damn what you think about me":they'll back off fuming.Then you've won.You said it yourself;people are generally assholes.Well if that's true,what does it matter what they think?Just be proud of who you are,and don't let anyone get to you

straightXed
04-16-2012, 04:01 PM
I honestly don't see why I need to act "like an adult" according to everyone else's definition. I don't see why I need to have sex or do substances or like "adult" things. I mean there's parts of me that have grown up, but some parts of me would rather play with Legos and watch cartoons. I see no harm in that.

well theres reasons why a 10 year old doesn't make adult decisions whether those decisions are about sexual responsibility or something else. 10 year olds have parents or gaurdians to make important choices for them but at 19 you should be attaining a level of maturity where you can make safe and responsible decisions for yourself. Its really nothing to do with watching cartoons or not its more about prioritising and being able to make choices that aren't those of a 10 year old who may prioritise cartoons and lego over anything else. Of course i have no idea what level of maturity you are at now as you initially suggest you hadn't matured past 10 but then say parts of you have grown up.


I've been getting shitty opinions about myself my whole life, and I just never really got over it... I feel it's really unfair and God should not be doing this type of thing to anyone. Maybe if people knew what I've been through, they'd stop mocking me, but I kinda doubt it, since people are generally assholes anyway. I admit I can't handle any criticism, which is why I'm so antisocial.



What the hell has god got to do with it? I mean if you are suggesting that its the doing of god what makes you think you would instantly understand the reasoning behind gods choice? How is it unfair at all anyway for people to have these opinions when you hold the opinion that people are assholes? You get accused of being a cry baby and this portion of your post illustrates exactly why...i mean there is absolutely no need for it. You have been through some stuff and now you want some kind of special treatment from people? If people knew what you had been through i hope they would be decent enough to treat you as normal still and not tip toe around you. But for the record if you can't handle criticism you would be better off either not writing posts like that which scream for critique or you could learn to handle some criticism and accept people will have opinions you won't agree with in life.

sleepyboi
04-24-2012, 03:05 PM
I can make some important decisions. The only real 10-year-old parts of me are my hobbies, I guess. I'm not completely kid-like.

Sorry if I offended you with the God bit.

It's just I try to ignore people... but at the same time... I really want to be liked. Everybody does. And people not liking me really gets to me. If I had a lot of good friends, one insult wouldn't bother me, but I don't. I barely have any, and insults just add to that. I feel like garbage.

straightXed
04-24-2012, 05:07 PM
I can make some important decisions. The only real 10-year-old parts of me are my hobbies, I guess. I'm not completely kid-like.


So i guess you do see why you need to act like an adult.



Sorry if I offended you with the God bit.


I'm not offended it just made no sense, was really hypocritical and came accross as an easy way to absolve yourself of any responsibility.



It's just I try to ignore people... but at the same time... I really want to be liked. Everybody does. And people not liking me really gets to me. If I had a lot of good friends, one insult wouldn't bother me, but I don't. I barely have any, and insults just add to that. I feel like garbage.

Theres a fundamental flaw with that, being liked is all well and good but who are the people that you want to like you? The same people you think are assholes and say and do shit you don't like. For the record i never suggested ignoring people but rather learning to accept that there will always be people with different opinions. The anti-social thing isn't going to serve you amazingly well, You don't need loads of great friends to combat an insult, having just one or two great friends is plenty and any more is a bonus. I would put less effort into worrying about what people that you think are assholes think about you. Or you will just end up trying to please people for no good reason, but ask yourself who's opinion of you is more valid...yours or that of someone who you don't even care for?

xxxfrekexxx
05-09-2012, 06:04 AM
I did it the other way around. I'm 32 and just claimed sXe. I used to party really hard every weekend! :)

sleepyboi
07-03-2012, 12:06 PM
I did it the other way around. I'm 32 and just claimed sXe. I used to party really hard every weekend! :)I like that better actually... because it's out of your system now. What if one day, even though I HIGHLY doubt it, but if I ever get that way... it'll suck as an older adult. =\