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View Full Version : Casual? Promiscuous? Please help me.



AxZxHxC
12-04-2003, 06:13 PM
So I am a little confused. What is the difference between casual and promiscuous sex? Are they both not supported by straight-edge beleifs? Thanks.

flame_still_burns
12-04-2003, 06:55 PM
Originally posted by AxZxHxC
So I am a little confused. What is the difference between casual and promiscuous sex? Are they both not supported by straight-edge beleifs? Thanks.

i'd say they are pretty much the same thing.

the whole sex thing is probably the least understood and least followed tenet of straightedge. i'm of the belief that if you are old enough to make the decision to have sex and you have a partner who is the same, then sex can be a healthy thing. i beleive that what is contradictory to the straightedge philosophy is turning the act of sex into some predator/prey scenario where guys are going out looking to get some. perhaps i'm only muddying the waters here, but i think they idea is to just be respectful towards the opposite sex... and just not be a user of people for sex.

it's difficult to find words for what i want to say.

what are others thoughts?

straightXed
12-05-2003, 01:28 AM
Originally posted by flame_still_burns
i'd say they are pretty much the same thing.

the whole sex thing is probably the least understood and least followed tenet of straightedge. i'm of the belief that if you are old enough to make the decision to have sex and you have a partner who is the same, then sex can be a healthy thing. i beleive that what is contradictory to the straightedge philosophy is turning the act of sex into some predator/prey scenario where guys are going out looking to get some. perhaps i'm only muddying the waters here, but i think they idea is to just be respectful towards the opposite sex... and just not be a user of people for sex.

it's difficult to find words for what i want to say.

what are others thoughts?

I think you put it well enough and thats pretty much the way i think about it too

xsecx
12-05-2003, 08:38 AM
I'll third it. I never understood why kids have decided to make a big deal out one line from one song.

xvunderx
12-05-2003, 09:46 AM
not to be a crowd follower, but I'll have to give a big here here.

sabresnmets
12-09-2003, 06:26 PM
i once met someone who was interested in a girl. he was straightedge, and she went to kiss him and he turned away. he said that he needed to be boyfriend-girlfriend before he would even kiss her. this scared the girl away, cause she didnt understand. i could see things both ways, but i dont think she should have given up before understanding. its in the eye of the beholder really.

AxZxHxC
12-09-2003, 07:36 PM
So, in a hypothetical sense, would engaging in causual/promiscuis sex be an adge break?

Nikon
12-09-2003, 10:56 PM
Originally posted by flame_still_burns
i'd say they are pretty much the same thing.

I think that it depends. I think that they CAN be the same thing, but I also think that they CAN be different. You're all thinking - WTF is he talking about right? In terms of sleeping around - yes they are the same. To have casual sex with many partners is the same as being promiscuous. However, if you look at it with the same partner, you are clearly not being promiscuous, but you can be casual with 1 partner. I am married. I have casual sex with my wife. Not always making love, not always fawking.... Am I making any sense at all? I don't know - I'll shut up now

flame_still_burns
12-10-2003, 07:08 AM
...i suppose i'd agree with that.

xsecx
12-10-2003, 07:56 AM
Originally posted by Nikon
I think that it depends. I think that they CAN be the same thing, but I also think that they CAN be different. You're all thinking - WTF is he talking about right? In terms of sleeping around - yes they are the same. To have casual sex with many partners is the same as being promiscuous. However, if you look at it with the same partner, you are clearly not being promiscuous, but you can be casual with 1 partner. I am married. I have casual sex with my wife. Not always making love, not always fawking.... Am I making any sense at all? I don't know - I'll shut up now

there is nothing casual about the commited relationship you're in though.

xvunderx
12-10-2003, 08:28 AM
the only difference I can see btween the two if I think about it is to be promiscuous you have to have sex with a fair amount of people, but you can have a casual one nighter with one person, that would be casual, but not really promiscuous.

I guess with what Nikon is saying it comes down to what you think of as "casual" to me if it's with someone you don't really care about, then it's just fucking, that i would describe as casual. If you are married or in a long term relationship, then there's reall feelings there, and love and commitment, to me that;s not casual, thats part of a relationship.

And to the dude who wouldn't even kiss the girl? I'm sxe and I'd leave him well alone. Since when was kissing sex? Anyone here say they'd lost their vaginity with their first kiss? Or are you a virgin till something more substantial happens? Yeah that goes up there with kids who won't take prescription drugs for fear of breaking edge.

xsecx
12-10-2003, 08:43 AM
Originally posted by AxZxHxC
So, in a hypothetical sense, would engaging in causual/promiscuis sex be an adge break?

not in my mind.

Nikon
12-10-2003, 10:34 AM
Originally posted by xsecx
there is nothing casual about the commited relationship you're in though.

Most certainly not - you are 100% right with that, however, I think that sex, he act, can be casual between to loving individuals. I think of it as, anytime/anywhere type of thing where we don't have to have candles going around the room and we aren't making love on a bed of roses... You know what I mean? Kind of like, ok - let's have sex. That to me is casual sex. We arn'e fawking and we aren't "making love". Anway, I think that I am just insane anyway... :-)


And to the dude who wouldn't even kiss the girl? I'm sxe and I'd leave him well alone. Since when was kissing sex? Anyone here say they'd lost their vaginity with their first kiss? Or are you a virgin till something more substantial happens? Yeah that goes up there with kids who won't take prescription drugs for fear of breaking edge.

1. That kids crazy.
2. I wont take "regular perscription" drugs just because I don't want to. I am edge for me, not for anyone else and if I were to get a Dr perscribed drug and someone said I was not edge anymore - fawk them, plain and simple. I tell doctors that I will not take perks or tylenol with codiene and they try to work with me. I also will not take nyquil because of the alcohol in it. Not saying that you are breaking edge if you do - it's just my choice. I do take motrin for the arthritis in my knees but that about the extent I will go.

sabresnmets
12-10-2003, 04:13 PM
i dont talk to that guy anymore, he got too preachy on me. before i was edge thats all hed talk about. it got annoying.

xsecx
12-10-2003, 05:10 PM
Originally posted by Nikon
Most certainly not - you are 100% right with that, however, I think that sex, he act, can be casual between to loving individuals. I think of it as, anytime/anywhere type of thing where we don't have to have candles going around the room and we aren't making love on a bed of roses... You know what I mean? Kind of like, ok - let's have sex. That to me is casual sex. We arn'e fawking and we aren't "making love". Anway, I think that I am just insane anyway... :-)



by definition you cannot have casual sex within a commited relationship since casual sex is sex without a commitment.

T3aRs 0f ScRl3t
01-06-2004, 11:52 PM
So having sex with someone you are not in a dedicated relationship with is not an edge break?......

drug free adult
01-10-2004, 10:07 AM
the only thing that every person who is straight edge[for the most part] can agree on breaking edge is smoking, drinking, drugs[caffiene is not an issue with most] now i do not sleep around, and i would not buy a prostitute or anything like that, but i have had sex with maybe 10 girls in my life. now don't forget though i am 32 years old, so for my age thats not a lot at all. i knew a 17 year old who had sex with 27 guys. i only have sex with girls i am in relationships with, so i don't see that breaking edge at all. it's really a big misinterpretation that idiots make. minor threat coined the phrase straight edge, and in one of their songs they say ''i don't fuck'' and one of the lines in filler is ''you call it religion you're full of shit'' so basically these kids follow what minor threat did when really straight edge was created as an anti drug concept. so saying part of straight edge means don't fuck which fucking is slang for having any kids of sex, then following religion is not straight edge either. i would say having sex, and following a religion is not breaking edge at all, and it would be kinda stupid to say either was.

drug free adult
01-10-2004, 10:10 AM
Originally posted by T3aRs 0f ScRl3t
So having sex with someone you are not in a dedicated relationship with is not an edge break?......
i wouldn't do it, but everyone has a different interpretation on sex, and straight edge. i would not really say it's breaking edge, but i would not say it is a good thing.

Sean The Red
01-10-2004, 02:39 PM
I see a signifigant difference between casual and pormiscious sex.
you can have casual sex with one person, but promiscuity would be if you had sex with multiple people.

sabresnmets
01-10-2004, 11:28 PM
exactly

T3aRs 0f ScRl3t
01-11-2004, 12:25 AM
So.... causal sex=edge break? Given that the two people engaging are not in a dedicated relationship......

sabresnmets
01-11-2004, 12:41 AM
holy crap. ok if you are boyfriend-girlfriend its ok if you have a new person in your bed every night, its not ok.

Sean The Red
01-11-2004, 01:27 AM
I think it would be fine if you werent in a dedicated relationship, just as long as you didnt go sleeping with a bunch of people.

MrWizzle
02-07-2004, 09:55 PM
The way I see it, the edge idea is the difference between "f**king" and "making love". To put it simply:

-The girl/guy you pick up at the bar/show/wherever, take home and have sex with, before leaving in the morning is "f**king".

-The girl/guy you've been going out with for ages, or some time anyway, and made a conscious decision to stick with him/her. It might not be true love yet, but you certainly have strong feelings, more than just lusting after a hot bod or something. That's "making love" - having sex with someone you care about, and that person only, for as long as you're together.

In my eyes, it's a respect thing - treating someone as another human being and sharing a very intimate thing with them, instead of just a vessel to come into, then toss aside.

But hey, that's just my opinion.

Sean The Red
02-09-2004, 12:07 AM
Originally posted by MrWizzle
The way I see it, the edge idea is the difference between "f**king" and "making love". To put it simply:

-The girl/guy you pick up at the bar/show/wherever, take home and have sex with, before leaving in the morning is "f**king".

-The girl/guy you've been going out with for ages, or some time anyway, and made a conscious decision to stick with him/her. It might not be true love yet, but you certainly have strong feelings, more than just lusting after a hot bod or something. That's "making love" - having sex with someone you care about, and that person only, for as long as you're together.

In my eyes, it's a respect thing - treating someone as another human being and sharing a very intimate thing with them, instead of just a vessel to come into, then toss aside.

But hey, that's just my opinion.

amen, people arent prizes, and shouldnt be treated, or talked about as though they were.

xgutterpunkcrew
02-22-2004, 01:12 PM
straight edge to me is no smoking, no drinking, no drugs. thats it.

xsecx
02-22-2004, 07:30 PM
Originally posted by xgutterpunkcrew
straight edge to me is no smoking, no drinking, no drugs. thats it.

then all mormons are edge?

xgutterpunkcrew
02-22-2004, 09:21 PM
Originally posted by xsecx
then all mormons are edge?
no not at all.

xsecx
02-22-2004, 09:24 PM
Originally posted by xgutterpunkcrew
no not at all.

but if edge is just not smoking, drinking or doing drugs, then they would be.

xgutterpunkcrew
02-22-2004, 09:30 PM
Originally posted by xsecx
but if edge is just not smoking, drinking or doing drugs, then they would be.
ahh you know what i mean. drug free, but not straight edge. unless of course they claim to be, but being a mormon doesn't automatically make you straight edge.

xsecx
02-22-2004, 09:34 PM
Originally posted by xgutterpunkcrew
ahh you know what i mean. drug free, but not straight edge. unless of course they claim to be, but being a mormon doesn't automatically make you straight edge.

why doesn't it? what's the difference between drug free and straight edge?

Sean The Red
02-22-2004, 09:51 PM
Originally posted by xgutterpunkcrew
ahh you know what i mean. drug free, but not straight edge. unless of course they claim to be, but being a mormon doesn't automatically make you straight edge.

no, it makes you foolish

sXeWrestler108
03-16-2004, 07:35 PM
as long as you have true feelings for that person I think it's ok but if your just going around having sex right and left then it's not a good thing.

xsecx
03-19-2004, 10:01 AM
Originally posted by sXeWrestler108
as long as you have true feelings for that person I think it's ok but if your just going around having sex right and left then it's not a good thing.

what's the difference? What does true feelings mean? at what point is something approriate and then it isn't?

sabresnmets
03-19-2004, 03:57 PM
yeah but i can say from past (and not so proud experiences) experiences that people think in the heat of the moment that the feelings are true.

Straightedgecat
04-11-2004, 02:30 PM
i agree totally with XsecX about the idea that if you are in a relationship and you and your girlfriend (or boyfriend) both have been in the relationship for a long time and you both feel that you ar ready then it is ok.. (as long as it is protected) .. but if you are just going out to find and fuck random girls then you are by far breaking your edge.. and there is nothing casual about having protected sex with the person that you are in a commited relationship with...

JEsse-

straightXed
04-11-2004, 02:57 PM
Originally posted by Straightedgecat
i agree totally with XsecX about the idea that if you are in a relationship and you and your girlfriend (or boyfriend) both have been in the relationship for a long time and you both feel that you ar ready then it is ok.. (as long as it is protected) .. but if you are just going out to find and fuck random girls then you are by far breaking your edge.. and there is nothing casual about having protected sex with the person that you are in a commited relationship with...

JEsse-

i don't think dusty ever said it was breaking edge.

xsecx
04-11-2004, 03:23 PM
Originally posted by Straightedgecat
i agree totally with XsecX about the idea that if you are in a relationship and you and your girlfriend (or boyfriend) both have been in the relationship for a long time and you both feel that you ar ready then it is ok.. (as long as it is protected) .. but if you are just going out to find and fuck random girls then you are by far breaking your edge.. and there is nothing casual about having protected sex with the person that you are in a commited relationship with...

JEsse-

yeah, I don't actually think that though. I don't really care what people do when it comes to sex. I don't think it has anything to do with edge. I think for the most part the kids that care about the sex portion of it are virgins and kids with weird hangups about sex.

Straightedgecat
04-11-2004, 05:13 PM
(originally posted by: XsecX) yeah, I don't actually think that though. I don't really care what people do when it comes to sex. I don't think it has anything to do with edge. I think for the most part the kids that care about the sex portion of it are virgins and kids with weird hangups about sex.



But would you find it Edge or not to just meet a girl on the street and to just have sex with her?? as i see it the sex part does not really play a huge role in being Straight Edge

xsecx
04-11-2004, 05:33 PM
Originally posted by Straightedgecat
(originally posted by: XsecX) yeah, I don't actually think that though. I don't really care what people do when it comes to sex. I don't think it has anything to do with edge. I think for the most part the kids that care about the sex portion of it are virgins and kids with weird hangups about sex.



But would you find it Edge or not to just meet a girl on the street and to just have sex with her?? as i see it the sex part does not really play a huge role in being Straight Edge

I don't think it has anything to do with edge. I do however think it's stupid.

Straightedgecat
04-11-2004, 05:44 PM
Originally posted by xsecx
I don't think it has anything to do with edge. I do however think it's stupid.

I dont think that it plays a large role in being edge but i think that this is one of those subject that you just have to take your own judgment on.. i feel that your just as edge if you have sex or if you dont.. i agree it dosnt matter (much)..

JEsse-

xsecx
04-11-2004, 05:47 PM
Originally posted by Straightedgecat
I dont think that it plays a large role in being edge but i think that this is one of those subject that you just have to take your own judgment on.. i feel that your just as edge if you have sex or if you dont.. i agree it dosnt matter (much)..

JEsse-

if you're just as edge one way or the other, then why does it matter at all?

Straightedgecat
04-11-2004, 05:52 PM
Originally posted by xsecx
if you're just as edge one way or the other, then why does it matter at all?

True.. very True..

xARAMVx
04-14-2004, 12:54 AM
Eh. My take is
A) don't be dirty (messes with your mind)
B) support the scene

Thats it. Drugs and alcohol make you dirty. Sleeping with a gazillion people and having onenight stands make you dirty. Supporting the scene is part of being edge. There ya go.

straightXed
04-14-2004, 05:10 AM
Originally posted by xARAMVx
Eh. My take is
A) don't be dirty (messes with your mind)
B) support the scene

Thats it. Drugs and alcohol make you dirty. Sleeping with a gazillion people and having onenight stands make you dirty. Supporting the scene is part of being edge. There ya go.

not that i condone this behaviour but how does a one night stand of protected sex make you dirty?

xARAMVx
04-14-2004, 02:05 PM
Originally posted by straightXed
not that i condone this behaviour but how does a one night stand of protected sex make you dirty?
Just does to me. Its a loveless affair. I don't know, maybe i'm just too much about the love

xsecx
04-14-2004, 02:25 PM
Originally posted by xARAMVx
Just does to me. Its a loveless affair. I don't know, maybe i'm just too much about the love

yeah, but don't you think love is a really grey area. it's not like it's a clear cut criteria. I'm sure there's many a person who's "fallen in love" with a 1 night stand over the years.

Straightedgecat
04-14-2004, 02:34 PM
Originally posted by straightXed
not that i condone this behaviour but how does a one night stand of protected sex make you dirty?

it kinda does make you dirty for that one night but i wouldnt say it makes you an all around "dirty person".. just on a persinal note i would feel alot less dirty if the one night stand (protected) was with a Straight Edge girl..

straightXed
04-14-2004, 03:43 PM
Originally posted by xARAMVx
Just does to me. Its a loveless affair. I don't know, maybe i'm just too much about the love

plenty of relationships and marriages are lacking the love, are they dirty too, like dusty said love is a pretty grey area, when two people are happy with the situation or relationship and its not harming anyone else what is dirty about it. Is it just a case of something you disapprove of and would feel dirty doing?

xARAMVx
04-14-2004, 06:10 PM
Originally posted by straightXed
plenty of relationships and marriages are lacking the love, are they dirty too, like dusty said love is a pretty grey area, when two people are happy with the situation or relationship and its not harming anyone else what is dirty about it. Is it just a case of something you disapprove of and would feel dirty doing?

Maybe thats just it, but i couldn't have sex with someone i was married with if i didn't love them. Is promiscous sex really harming anyone? it is very very gray and so long as you are edge for yourself, its up to your interpritation... unless you're in an edge break face break situation =/

Straightedgecat
04-14-2004, 07:22 PM
Originally posted by xARAMVx
Maybe thats just it, but i couldn't have sex with someone i was married with if i didn't love them. Is promiscous sex really harming anyone? it is very very gray and so long as you are edge for yourself, its up to your interpritation... unless you're in an edge break face break situation =/

well it matters what do you consider to be promiscous sex?